Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Being boring......rehashed

Enbiem had once put up a lovely poem called Being Boring by Wendy Cope on her blog.  I instantly loved it and the humor she has used, and i forwarded it to all my buddies.  Here's the poem:

Being Boring 
If you ask me 'What's new?', I have nothing to say
Except that the garden is growing.
I had a slight cold but it's better today.
I'm content with the way things are going.
Yes, he is the same as he usually is,
Still eating and sleeping and snoring.
I get on with my work. He gets on with his.
I know this is all very boring.

There was drama enough in my turbulent past:
Tears and passion-I've used up a tankful.
No news is good news, and long may it last,
If nothing much happens, I'm thankful.
A happier cabbage you never did see,
My vegetable spirits are soaring.
If you're after excitement, steer well clear of me.
I want to go on being boring.

I don't go to parties. Well, what are they for,
If you don't need to find a new lover?
You drink and you listen and drink a bit more
And you take the next day to recover.
Someone to stay home with was all my desire And,
now that I've found a safe mooring,
I've just one ambition in life: I aspire
To go on and on being boring.

-- Wendy Cope

Now my dear friend Mr.Pawan Arora found the perfect excuse to provoke me and replied to my email with: "Good one but I think you can add on to this."  The fkr knows me too well and that i'd grab the slightest opportunity to do anything other than work.  So i stirred up my noodles a bit and sent him my version of the poem.

Now to really get this poem, i'll have to introduce u to its two main characters: 

Pawan (toinng) Arora is a man in his 4th or 5th decade.  His seniority (in age and designation) oozes out of the tone and body language he uses with us junior folk.  Otherwise he's just a great guy....who has an ability to knock ones wind out with a well timed razor sharp one-liner.  But during the last year this dude has lost a lot of his old cheerful nature and has become more and more serious every day.   

Manjrekar is a friend who works in a competing organization, a kid just out of college, typically cocky (!) and smart mouthed.  He peaked the popularity charts at work because 'somebody' made up the story that he was regularly 'servicing' his boss when out on meetings in his car.  You know how impossible it is to let something like this go!  There was a whole slew of manjrekar jokes involving car seats, inconvenient steering wheels, flossing, chocobars, etc etc etc.  You got the picture right?

Well here goes....

Our Toinng Arora is a nice old man
His abilities noone can question
But lately he seems to be bogged down by
Work pressure and traffic congestion

He rarely replies to mails sent by
Old buddies who love him so much
The intimacy seems to have worn off a li'l
Now that we are not physically in touch

Wake up dear friend, goof around a bit
Get out and get wet when its pouring
You're surrounded by so many silly idiots
There's no reason to go on being boring

Look at Manjrekar, a fine young fella
With mischief written on his visage
He's on for a joke or a quip or a poke
Or even for a naughty little massage

He's eager for action and also adventure
He keeps lookin for things more exciting
But God knows why he picked an activity where
He can add to the thrill just by biting
It will help his career (at the cost of his rear)
And surely this cant be called whoring
As long he has a boss and that boss has a car
His life will never be boring

- Vivek Rao